


The difficult day after

by Vinushuka



Series: Life inside and outside Dir en grey [11]
Category: Dir en grey, Sukekiyo (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-05
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-19 20:51:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7376932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vinushuka/pseuds/Vinushuka
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Die calls Toshiya to hear the latest news from his meeting with Kyo. They also set a date for their dinner party with Mari.   Toshiya tries to keep himself busy without Kyo by designing a gym for himself. He also plans to buy a new double bed because he now has a plan concerning Die...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The difficult day after

Toshiya woke up when his cell phone started to buzz. He grabbed the thing from the night table and mumbled something into it.

“Good morning! Did I wake you up?” Die asked sounding disgustingly perky.

It was already nine o’clock in the morning and Toshiya was a little ashamed for sleeping in so late. He must have been both mentally and physically exhausted when he returned home from Kyo’s place.

“Yes, you did, but it was already high time to wake up so no problem.”

“How was your evening with Kyo?” Die asked. “Did he try to persuade you to cancel your decision?”

“The evening was great. It was actually very good to meet once more and talk things over. And no, he didn’t persuade me into anything”, Toshiya replied slightly annoyed.

“So, is that it then?” Die wanted to know as if he was hoping Toshiya would leave Kyo for good.

“I guess so. We will of course meet in the rehearsals but I’m not going to see him before that. Why do you ask?”

“I’m just worried about your welfare”, Die replied somewhat vaguely. “Actually I’m calling because Mari proposed a date for our dinner party. It can take place either on Tuesday or Wednesday next week.”

“Both days are fine for me. Pick whatever date suits you.” Toshiya sounded slightly indifferent but that didn’t seem to bother Die.

“In that case I will propose Tuesday to her. I have some engagements on Wednesday afternoon and I’m not sure if I could make it on time. By the way, are you okay now? I should go to a party tonight so I can’t be there with you”, Die worried.

“Of course I can manage. I will start to plan my gym downstairs. I got all necessary details from Kyo yesterday.”

“That’s fine then. Take care”, Die finished the call.

      Toshiya lingered in his bed still a while going through the memories of last evening. Making love with Kyo had been exquisite as always. He remembered vividly how it felt to hold Kyo’s heavy weapon in his hand and how powerful he had felt himself when he made Kyo explode right at his face. The sensation of Kyo’s warm sperm spreading on his face made Toshiya excited again and woke up his sleepy manhood. He took it in his hand and started to caress himself first gently and them more vigorously towards an orgasm he wanted.

      He pushed his fingertip into a sperm drop he had squirted on his belly and spread the thick liquid on his skin thinking about the future. Was this going to be his only joy from now on? The thought of being alone brought tears into his eyes once more. Toshiya had managed not to cry yesterday but now he was overwhelmed by the sorrow of being without Kyo. He cried quietly until his physical needs took the better of him. He was hungry and he needed to pee.

       He stalked into the bathroom and took a long hot shower to get rid of the pain tormenting him. After a sturdy breakfast he felt a little better so he grabbed a piece of paper, a pen and a measure to plan his exercise facilities downstairs. He searched on supplier’s webpages the footprints of the equipment he had selected and inserted them into his layout plan. He had to do some juggling with the plan before he could fit everything he needed in the limited space he had. Finally he was satisfied with the end result and climbed upstairs to call Kyo’s contact person and placed the order. There was no reason to delay this acquisition. Physical exercise had always made Toshiya feel better and that’s what he needed now.

      In the afternoon he went for a long jog and after that to a close by grocery store to buy ingredients for his dinner. He had just returned from the store when he received a message from Kyo. The pain that he had managed to keep at bay during the day hit him hard when he read Kyo’s words about missing him. Toshiya knew he shouldn’t encourage Kyo but anyhow he wrote exactly how he felt: that this was difficult for him and that he loved Kyo. Why should he lie him about his feelings?

      Toshiya was sure that Kyo would ask the question ‘why’ after his outburst. He had been wondering the same thing himself over and over again and always come up with the same answer: because he needed to prove himself he could manage alone. When the question came, Toshiya had the answer ready and Kyo settled for that. He would have to wait for their rehearsals to see Toshiya. By that time Toshiya would be wiser about many things: How much alone time he really needed, was Die more than just a friend to him and could he really give up his gorgeous love life with Kyo?

       When Toshiya crept to bed in the evening his thoughts strayed again to Kyo and then to Die. How would it feel to make love with him? He tried to imagine Die laying on his bed waiting for Toshiya to push himself in, but all he could see was Kyo’s beautiful back tattoos and his slender fingers clutching to a sheet.  Perhaps he was trying to see too far. Maybe he should just imagine kissing Die? But even that turned out to be impossible. All he could see were the holes of Kyo’s piercings under his fingertip and those gorgeous sensual lips waiting to be kissed.

      Toshiya had only once sat beside sleeping Die and kissed his cheek to say goodnight, otherwise there were no memories to cling to. It would be a long and painful process to close the images of Kyo and their lovemaking out of his mind. Hating him would have helped but Toshiya wasn’t even annoyed about Kyo’s overwhelming adoration that had driven him to the brink of exhaustion.

      Toshiya sat up on his bed feeling frustrated and stared at his surroundings. This bed was definitely too narrow to make love with anyone, Kyo or Die. He needed a new one right away. Maybe he could lure Die to test the new bed with him next week. He just wanted to see Die sleep and get used to having him close. Everything else would have to wait. “Yes that would be the way to go”, he thought and laid down satisfied that he now had a plan.


End file.
